I totally feel like I could have written this book this year! I can't wait til Xmas is over!

Merry Christmas

Christmas Cookie Rules:
1. If you eat a Christmas cookie fresh out of the oven, it has no calories because everyone knows that the first cookie is the test and thus calorie free.
2. If you drink a diet soda after eating your second cookie, it also has no calories because the diet soda cancels out the cookie calories.
3. If a friend comes over while you're making your Christmas cookies and needs to sample, you must sample with your friend. Because your friend's first cookie is calorie free (see rule #1), yours is also. It would be rude to let your friend sample alone .
4. Any cookie calories consumed while walking around will fall to your feet and eventually fall off as you move. This is due to gravity and the density of the caloric mass.
5. Any calories consumed during the frosting of the Christmas cookies will be used up because it takes many calories to lick excess frosting from a knife without cutting your tongue.
6. Cookies colored red or green have very few calories. Red ones have three and green ones have five - one calorie four each letter. Make more red ones!
7. Cookies eaten while watching any classic Christmas shows on TV have no calories because they are part of the traditional entertainment package and not part of one's personal fuel.
8. As always, cookie pieces contain no calories because the process of breaking causes calorie leakage.
9. Any cookies consumed from someone Else's plate have no calories since the calories rightfully belong to the other person and will cling to their plate. We all know how calories like to cling
! 10. Any cookies consumed while feeling stressed have no calories because cookies used for medicinal purposes NEVER have calories. It's a rule!
Merry Christmas - enjoy your cookies!

Truer Words Have Never Been Written

Whatever you give a woman, she will make greater.
If you give her sperm, she'll give you a baby.
If you give her a house, she'll give you a home.
If you give her groceries, she'll give you a meal.
If you give her a smile, she'll give you her heart.
She multiplies and enlarges what is given to her.
So, if you give her any crap, be ready to receive a ton of shit.

I cannot explain just how profoundly true this is to my life right now!

Happy Thanksgiving!!

Sunday Stealing 2 days late

1. Do you like blue cheese salad dressing? I'm from Buffalo, of course!
2. Favorite late night snack? something salty then something chocolatey
3. Do you own a gun? No
4. What’s your favorite drink at Starbucks or other specialty coffee shop? ET Mocha from Taste in East Aurora Ny - or Hot Chocolate at home spiked with vanilla vodka
5. Do you get nervous before doctor appointments? not really
6. What do you think of hot dogs? In February they remind me of summer! Heavy mustard, relish and onions with the roll toasted please!
7. Favorite Christmas song? Eartha Kitt's "Santa Baby"
8. What do you prefer to drink in the morning? Hot Cinnamon Spice Tea from Harney & Sons
9. Can you do push-ups? Yes, but why would I?
10. What’s your favorite piece of jewelry? My mother's ring.
11. Favorite hobby? Reading, watching movies.
12. Do you have A.D.D.? Occasionally
13. What’s one trait that you hate about yourself? I'm not a very good listener.
14. The last disease you contracted? Kidney stones.
15. Name 3 thoughts at this exact moment. Can kidney stones be contracted? Why am I taking the time to do this? Do I have to finish my oatmeal?
16. Name 3 drinks you regularly drink? Water, water and tea.
17. Current worry right now? my marriage
18. Current hate right now? liars
19. Favorite place to be? curled up on the couch with 2 boys, a dog,and my favorite blanket
20. How did you ring in the New Year?usually in bed half asleep
21. Like to travel? absolutely!
22. Name three people who will complete Sunday Stealing this week: can't think of one
23. Do you own slippers? several pairs
24. What color shirt are you wearing? blah pink
25. Do you like sleeping on satin sheets? wouldn't know, never have.
26. Can you whistle? yes, but not well
27. Favorite singer/band? Michael Buble, Peggy Lee
28. Could you ever make it 39 days on the show Survivor? why would I want to?
29. What songs do you sing in the shower? "Losing My Religion"
30. Favorite girl’s names? Natalie,Sophia,
31. Favorite boy’s name? Andrew, Lucas
32. What’s in your pocket right now? fuzz
33. Last thing that made you laugh? "Big Bang Theory" last night
34. Like your job? Which one? Yes to all 3.
36. Do you love where you live? Pretty much. Could do without the 6 months of snow.
37. How many TVs do you have in your house? one
38. Who is your loudest friend? Teri Widley - but she would say I'm louder and she'd be right.
39. Do you drive the speed limit or speed? both, but more often speed.
40. Does someone have a crush on you? that would be the day!
41. What is your favorite book? Pride and Prejudice
42. What is your favorite candy? Sponge candy
43. Favorite Sports Team? don't honestly have one, but Go Sabres!
44. What were you doing 12 AM last night? sleeping
45. What was the first thing you thought of when you woke up today?Yeah! It's only 5:15am, I don't have to get up yet!

Grateful

My buddy gingersnapspice posts on Sunday a week's worth of reasons to be grateful. This has been a very difficult week for me and I feel the need to copy her fine example.
1. Having friends I can call at all hours of the day and ask, "Am I stupid?" and have them reply without hesitation, "No!".
2. Having family who supports me during trouble without really knowing what the trouble is.
3. The unconditional love of my dog. (This may seem strange, but being welcomed home with a smile, even though I've just walked across the street to the mailbox, really brightens the day.)
4. That my children are healthy and happy, doing well in school and seem well on their way to being really great people in their own right.
5. Having movies and books to escape in.
6. Hope.
7. Forgiveness.